The Horrible advice game.

Call her on the phone and dump her - then lay on the bed and get drunk until you fall off the bed lying face up - then at some point you will vomit and it come down in your open mouth and you will aspirate it and choke(like Jimi Hendrix) - then you will never know anything again. Girls usually don't like to talk to dead people. On the other hand if she is all brokenhearted and think she caused your death - she might visit your grave!

How can I entirely clean my room out - i mean everything out of it - in 3 hours or less?

Light a match


How do I get rid of yet ANOTHER ear infection?

Ask someone to tie you to a wooden post, put a bunch of logs around you, and light a match to the wood. Edward Wightman was the last man to be burned at the stake for heresy in England, in 1612 - if he ever had an ear infection - he never had one after that day!

How can I not lose my fourth cell phone in 5 years?

Tie it to the end of your "manhood" ---- a guy ALWAYS knows where THAT is.... you'll NEVER lose it again...


--- How do I stop the puppy from having "accidents" in the house?

sell the house and move into a cardboard box


how can i get away with killing a bunch of Weblos scouts?

Easy. You will need a sleeping bag, a tent, a jar of honey, a bottle of smooth lager beer(like Beck's), and some sleeping pills.

Take the scouts camping and early in the morning when they are all asleep - sneak out into the woods with a jar of honey. Then walk back to the tents dripping honey as you go. Down the sleeping pills with the Beck's so you aren't tempted to run away when the bear comes and kills you all.

Harrier

(Harrier, you forgot to ask a question)

true - sorry!

ummm... how can i become a Phoenix?

Harrier